Fourth Week of Lent
Ephesians 4:17-5:20
Monday
Read Ephesians 4:17-5:20, and focus on 4:17-24. Paul instructs the Ephesians to not live like the world around them, to put off their old self, and to put on their new self. In other words, when we begin to follow Jesus, we begin an entire new life. So our lives should look different with Jesus.
The question becomes, how do we put on this new self? Is it as simple as putting on a new set of clothes? How wonderful it would be if putting on the new self was as easy as cutting tags off of clothes we just bought and putting them on! But experience tells us it’s not that easy. Old habits die hard. It can be very discouraging to look at the teachings in this long passage and say, I’m trying so hard to do all of this, but I keep going back to my old ways.
Thankfully, putting on the new self is not a matter of simply trying harder to live the way God wants us to live. Notice what Paul writes in 4:23: “..to be made new in the attitude of your minds…” To be made new is a passive action; it is something God does in us, not something we actively do by ourselves. Now to be sure, there are areas in our lives where we can work hard and grow in self-discipline so that we can live for Jesus. But we have to remember first and foremost that this process of putting on the new self begins with God doing a transformative work in us.
So instead of beginning this week trying harder to follow Jesus, ask the Lord to do a powerful work of transformation in your mind and in your heart. Ask the Lord to help you change. Make your prayer today similar to the words of David in Psalm 51:10 “Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.” And then watch this week as the Lord does a work of renewal in you.
Tuesday
Read Ephesians 4:17-5:20, and focus on 4:25-5:2. The first major area Paul addresses in this passage is the area of speech ethics. How we speak to each other is critical for having healthy relationships. Paul is clear that the words we speak should only be for building others up, not tearing others down. But often we use our words to build ourselves up, usually at the expense of others. James describes the tongue as “a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.” (James 3:6). Sadly, we have all experienced this, both when we have been hurt by someone’s words, and when we have hurt someone with our words. Words tend to be used as weapons and not as loving tools that build relationships.
How can we grow so that our words are building up those around us? In Scouts, my boys learned knife safety before they could get their whittling chip and use a pocket knife. They learned how to make a safety circle to ensure no one is within arm’s reach of them as they use their knife. Now clearly there is no speech safety class required before people learn to speak. But what if we as followers of Jesus learned to ask some simple questions in our head as we speak? Are the words I’m about to speak helpful to others? Encouraging? Focused on loving others or focused on myself? Am I about to speak with love or with anger? If we were to ask these kinds of questions as we go through our day we would very quickly see whether our words are building or killing relationships.
Take some time today and ask the Lord to help you grow in the area of your speech. Pray that the Lord builds a filter into your mind and heart so that you can think before you speak, to ensure that your words are building relationships, and not killing them. Ask the Lord to help you get rid of anger and bitterness that may be behind your words (4:31). And if you realize that your words have been destructive, ask for forgiveness from the people you have hurt, and forgive those who have hurt you (4:32).
Wednesday
Read Ephesians 4:17-5:20, and focus on 5:3-14. The other major area Paul addresses in this passage is the area of purity, specifically sexual purity. Paul says in 5:3 that “there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality…” Relationships get built up and strengthened when we follow God’s plan for sexual purity.
Today we live in a culture where decisions about sexuality are not made based on God’s Word, but based on what feels right. The saying, “as long as you’re not hurting anyone” has become the permission slip to justify almost anything. But many of the decisions made under the umbrella of “as long as you don’t hurt anyone” actually do hurt people. Pornography is not harmless. It rewires the brain and makes real sex and intimacy in marriage more difficult, not to mention the horrible damage it does to women caught up in that industry. And even sex before marriage, seen by many as harmless, or even beneficial, hijacks the natural emotional development of a romantic relationship, which is one of the reasons the woman in Song of Songs pleads with the daughters of Jerusalem to “not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.” (Song of Songs 3:5). That’s a poetic way of saying, “wait until after the wedding!”
As followers of Jesus, what if we were radical in our commitment to sexual purity? What if we were radical in considering what we allow our eyes to see, and what boundaries we cross in our romantic relationships? Not only would our relationships be strengthened, but we would be able to serve younger generations of believers, especially our youth who are faced with all kinds of temptations, and share with them that God’s way really is better!
Ask the Lord today to help you grow in the area of purity. Ask for forgiveness for the times you have struggled in this area. And if you need help in this area, ask a trusted friend who can help you follow Jesus with regards to your purity. It is worth being radical here. Because as we grow in purity, our relationships will grow as well.
Thursday
Read Ephesians 4:17-5:20, and focus on 5:15-20. In this passage Paul has focused on the actions that destroy relationships, specifically the areas of speech and purity. You probably read at least parts of this passage with conviction, realizing there is room for growth in these areas. The question naturally arises then, how can I change? Thankfully Paul finishes this section with the answer in 5:18: “be filled with the Spirit.” The more we are filled up with God’s Spirit, the harder it is to hurt each other with our words and the harder it is to give into temptation that would compromise our purity.
So how do we get filled with God’s Spirit? Paul tells us in verse 19 and 20. He teaches us to speak to each other “with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit.” Then he tell us to praise the Lord in our hearts and to give thanks to him for everything. As we grow in praise and thankfulness, and we encourage others to praise and be thankful, we get filled up in a way where we can bless others and build healthy relationships.
Take some time today and ask the Lord to fill you with his Spirit. If you are struggling in the area of thanksgiving and praise, take a sheet of paper or a journal and write down everything you have to be thankful for. Then take that list (it’s probably longer than you thought!) and praise God for everything he has done for you. As you praise the Lord, watch as your heart becomes more inclined to the Lord, and watch as he fills you with his Spirit, and gives you more of a desire to honor him in these areas of speech and purity.
Friday
Read Ephesians 4:17-5:20, and focus on 4:32. Every single person can read this passage and see areas where they have failed. And it is easy to look at our failures and experience shame and guilt for how we have rebelled against God and against his plan for healthy relationships. And sadly, many Christians live under that heavy burden of guilt and shame every single day. You may be at the end of this week, having worked through these devotionals and are feeling that burden of guilt and shame, saying, wow, I’ve messed this up in every way imaginable.
What we must remember when we experience this burden is that Jesus died for our sins. 4:32 is a reminder of what Paul has been talking about throughout Ephesians, that through the blood of Jesus, God has forgiven us. So while this passage shows us how serious our sin is, and how damaging it can be to our relationships, it also shows us that the blood of Jesus covers that sin, and that when we confess our sin and turn to Jesus, he takes that sin and removes it from us. Jesus took the punishment we deserve. So instead of feeling guilt and shame for our sin, and living under that burden, we can experience freedom and joy, because Jesus has removed that burden from us!
So take some time today and receive God’s grace. Let God remove the burden of your guilt and shame. And then as you experience the freedom that comes from living in God’s grace, ask the Lord how you can live radically for him going forward. Regardless of past failures, you can live radically for him today. And this is something we can do together. Ask the Lord how you can help someone else experience God’s grace, and how you can live God’s way together.
Saturday
Read Ephesians 4:17-5:20 one more time and review the devotionals from this week. Thank the Lord both for the conviction he brings through this passage, as well as for his forgiveness and grace he offers for our failures revealed in this passage.
Earlier in the week we saw David’s prayer in Psalm 51, asking the Lord to give him a pure heart. These verses are the foundation for the song Create In Me Clean Heart, by Keith Green. Take some time today and let the renewing power of God’s grace, seen in this song, sink deep into your heart!
Create in me a clean heart, oh God
And renew a right spirit within me
Create in me a clean heart, oh God
And renew a right spirit within me
Cast me not away from Thy presence, oh Lord
And take not Thy holy spirit from me
Restore unto me the joy of Thy salvation
And renew a right spirit within me